Resting her head on his broad chest, the girl wished
It would be forever, how wonderful it’d be
If it were forever, to be with him, to feel his warmth
To listen to his heartbeat; ‘He’s mine!’
‘She sure smells nice’, the boy thought and wondered
About the next step; ‘should I rush it or not’-
Unable to control his arousal,
He was a bit embarrassed but happy –
‘Gently’, he told himself, ‘be deliberate’, but then he was ashamed
And felt guilty, his love and lust tearing him in two.
Pressing herself closer to him
The girl was a bit scared but excited –
‘he loves me, he loves me’, she thought
Triumphant at her new possession, her new puppet.
The boy re-positioned himself, moving to the second stage
As the girl wondered if this is the time to show some reluctance
Would coyness be appropriate or would it kill his passion, she wasn’t sure.
Ah, but man proposes and God disposes – leaning down to a exploratory kiss,
Eyes closed - suddenly the boy shuddered as a wave of nausea hit him
Because the girl, beautiful though she was,
Had forgotten to brush her teeth that morning!
******** Balachandran V , Trivandrum 08.03.2011
Nicely written.. My wishes!
ReplyDeleteThis is so funny.... you created an atmosphere of melodrama. I was holding my breath till I read the last word...
ReplyDeleteGreat !
It was s romantic and then the anti-climax. I just have a thought.
ReplyDeleteYour title "The Anticlimax" gives away in the beginning even before the poem is read. The reader expects an anti-climax; also supporting it is the picture right in the beginning before the poem.
You may want to consider this; give reader the jolt when least expected.
But even with the surely predictable type of ending; the poem weaves silky passion and romance. You sure must be a die-hard romantic :)
Talking of anti-climax; I have few anti-climax stories. If you are interested please check them under
http://spice-n-ice.blogspot.com/search/label/Fiction
Yes the picture of Rhett Butler and Scarlet O'hara gave away the anticlimax before the climax.
ReplyDeleteNevertheless I shudder to think of the moment the poor fellow recoiled.
Yes the picture of Rhett Butler and Scarlet O'hara gave away the anticlimax before the climax.
ReplyDeleteNevertheless I shudder to think of the moment the poor fellow recoiled.
full of romance and thought
ReplyDeleteenjoyed it
That is why they carry breath fresheners these days !
ReplyDelete