Cessation

The silken hair that brushes past my arm and moves away like a breeze


Leaving me still, leaving a fragrance that makes me close my eyes


and think of nothing -




That look Waheeda gives - come hither- and sings


'Jane kya tu ne kahi'


Meenakumari dressing up for her husband


Nargis asking the moon to hide behind clouds


Madhabi Mukherjee singing, swaying in the swing


Dimple with her heart going thud thud in the flickering flames...




Listening to Lata, to songs spanning decades, I lie, letting the flood


of memories


Of beautiful women, so painfully beautiful, hurting me


Hurting me, all the while I ask for more pain...




Sharmila tells me 'Nindiya na aaye...'




I look at you, women, at your curls and wish


You would smother me in them;


When I die I will carry


Your scent with me.




I look at you, women, at your dark, liquid eyes


That makes me want to drown in them


The sweat beads that I will lick


Your tremulous lips that I will kiss and


Breath in deep you, as I nip your earlobes.




I look at you, women, at your slender fingers


And imagine them tracing patterns on me


Your smooth, rounded shoulders I will stain with my kiss.




As your arms encircle my head and press my face gently


To your softness, in great tenderness -


All I have to do is to close my eyes


And Time and Space would cease to be.




******* Balachandran V, Alappuzha, 05.03.2012