Howl

Late in the night, there is a time

When silence is total, for sometime.

Traffic stops then; tramps slump

Dogs stop barking, cats stop yowling,

Breaths are bated; leaves are frozen stiff.

Later, in the stillness of the night

When I must have slipped deeper

Into a slumber that is akin to death –

My old dog let out a howl.

There is an explosion deep in the heart

Shaken up from a dreamless sleep

A sense of regret, having to return –

I shush him, snuggle deeper into the sheets.

Slowly I must have wafted back

Into the swirls of sleep once again –

This time the howl was louder and longer

For the younger one now joined his father.

My head was being blown apart –

Jerking up, I shout, “SHADDAUP YOU DOPES!!”

Dropped back like a stiff nudged down

Struggling to remember my shattered dreams.

Why should there be a third time always?

The best of three or the worst of three

Why on your mark one two three

Why in myths, boons are always three?

I just sat up, blinking my eyes, feeling numb.

Scratched my groin,

Groped for a butt,

The beginning of yet another sleepless night.

The howl did have a beauty to it.

It began on a low key, skipped a couple

Went up piercing the moonlit night

Like a shaft of sorrow splitting my heart.

It was a ghoulish, mournful howl

It went ow ow o wow as if in pain –

As if death was on its daily prowl.

Beyond the gate, under the lamp

That streetwalker bitch was hanging about

Her eyes glinted in the light of my torch –

My old dog turns, looks at me -

Humble, gentle and apologetic.

“Don’t you know, master,

That I need my bitch

Just as you do yours?

Look at my boy, he needs one

To sow his seeds, as you did.

Let me out, let me be free

For a night to run with her.

To roam the streets, rumble with the boys

Let me be me just for a night.

Early in the morn

As you very well know,

I will be home wagging my tail

Your friend and servant, faithful and true.”

The stone must have hit

Right on her teats

For she let out a yelp

And ran into the night.

“Go to sleep”, I tell my dogs.

Tails are wagged politely

Doors are barred

Windows are shut –

Silence returns

Though sleep doesn’t, to my lonesome side.

************* Balachandran, Trivandrum 12-10-2008
(Apologies to Allen Ginsberg )